The VOice I needed

Let’s be real—many of us grew up in homes where survival was the focus. There wasn’t space to talk about feelings, much less trauma. We were taught to be strong, keep it moving, and not air “family business.” But inside? Many of us were carrying deep wounds that no one talked about.

If this is you, I want to offer the voice I needed when I was younger. A voice rooted in love, truth, and community. A voice that says: You’re not alone. What you went through matters. And healing is your birthright.

You’re Not Crazy. You’re Carrying a Lot.

So many of us grew up with experiences we didn’t have the language for—emotional neglect, being parentified, witnessing violence, or constantly feeling like we had to earn love. Maybe the adults around you were doing the best they could, but that doesn’t mean the impact wasn’t real.

You may have grown up being “the strong one.” The fixer. The one who held it down while no one checked in on you. And now, as an adult, you’re realizing you’ve been holding more than your share. That’s not your fault.

Survival Taught You a Lot—But You Deserve More Than Just Surviving

Let’s honor the fact that you made it through. That your resourcefulness, your faith, your culture, your ancestors—carried you this far. But now? You deserve to live, not just survive. You deserve softness, rest, boundaries, and joy.

Hyper-independence, people-pleasing, perfectionism—these are not personality traits. They’re survival responses. And it’s okay if you’re tired of carrying them.

Your Pain Is Real—Even If No One Talked About It

In many of our cultures, there’s a deep stigma around mental health. Maybe you were told to “pray it away,” “just be grateful,” or that “other folks had it worse.” But pain is not a competition. Your pain is valid, whether it was loud or quiet, whether it looked like chaos or silence.

There is strength in finally giving yourself permission to feel, to remember, to heal.

You Can Break Cycles Without Breaking Yourself

Breaking generational patterns is sacred work—but it can be exhausting. You don’t have to do it all at once. You don’t have to do it perfectly. And you don’t have to do it alone.

There are safe spaces, culturally competent therapists, healing circles, books, and ancestral practices that can hold you while you do this work. Healing doesn't mean abandoning your people—it means coming back to yourself.

You Are the Healer Your Younger Self Was Waiting For

You have every right to write a new story for yourself. You get to redefine love, family, rest, and success on your own terms. You get to speak your truth and still be worthy of love.

Some days will be hard. But every step toward healing is an act of resistance. An act of reclamation. An act of love.

To everyone carrying the weight of what wasn’t said, what wasn’t allowed to be felt, what wasn’t safe to name—this is for you.
May you find your voice, your people, and your peace.